Reunited, It Doesn't Feel So Good

Bluffton Today column, March 16, 2007

Lately I’ve been hearing a Peaches & Herbs song playing on a loop in my head, “Reunited and it feels so good, reunited ‘cause we understood …” It is driving me crazy.

You see, one day last week I came home to find an email from Classmates.com in my inbox. The email indicated that I had received a "Classmates Email" from an ex-boyfriend, who by the way, shall remain anonymous in order to protect the innocent.

I couldn't resist, I had to click.

The subject of the email from said ex was, "Just wondering" and went on to read, "Are you the Courtney Hampson who used to live in Brick, NJ in the 90's? If so, I think you may know who I am? If you are, how are you doing?"

Suddenly it all came rushing back; this guy was a semi-nerd then and is clearly still a bozo today. I mean seriously, if you took the trouble to go to the website, look up the year you know I graduated high school and the town you know I lived in, and found my name there, chances are it is me, right?

Anyway, I was at a crossroads. Do I ignore his email or do I respond and tell him how wonderful my life is today, sans him. I of course, chose the later. My reply went something like this …

“Yes, I am the Courtney Hampson who lived in Brick, NJ and graduated in 1991 and yes, of course I know who you are.

I am great! I live Bluffton, South Carolina (Hilton Head area) with my husband, Joe. My mom and Sharon and her husband all live here as well. We love it in the South. We had a beautiful new home built. We are close to the beach and of course lots of golf. I have an amazing job in marketing, I write a weekly column for the local paper and I am teaching classes at the college level…”

Basically, my message was eat your heart out buddy, I am so much better than you ever imagined.

I’m not sure if it worked though. I am on day sixteen of the Classmates.com watch, and still no reply from the ex. (Did I mention that Joe thinks I am kook for even visiting the website?)

My dismay over why he chose not to respond got the best of me and I felt the need to explore further so I delved deep into his Classmates profile. And, oh boy you won’t believe what I found. His favorite music is the latest mix-tape that he made. (Alert, alert, alert!)

Now, making mix tapes was pretty hip in the 80’s, but it wasn’t cool in 1996 when I dated him (yes, he still made mix tapes in 1996) and I am pretty sure it is definitely not cool now. I mean does anyone still actually produce tapes? Are they even available in the stores? As I pictured him holed up in his garage with a boom box, that got me thinking…

Why did I embark on this mini-fact-finding-mission to discover more about a guy I dumped over a decade ago? More importantly, why are millions of people each day using these sites to reconnect?

Is it an honest desire to find someone from your past and catch up? Or is it the chance to finally one-up that girl who dumped you in the 9th grade? I haven’t found the answer, although I continue to be intrigued by the phenomenon.

As I penned this column and talked with Joe about how ridiculous the concept of Classmates.com is he gently reminded me about my little encounter with Reunion.com, which I had blocked from my memory. He apparently finds my craziness mildly entertaining and thought I should fess up, so I will.

Last year, I received an email from Reunion.com saying “Someone is looking for you. Join now to reconnect!” I couldn’t resist. I logged on and swiftly dropped $29 for an annual membership to find out who was searching for me.

Well, sadly it Paula Siminski from the class of 1968. She graduated five years before I was even born. $29 down the drain.

I haven’t found an answer yet to the question of why we (me and three trillion members of classmates.com and reunion.com) have this need to look to the past.

I am guessing that we all really want that Sally Field Oscar moment … you love me, you really love me!

Courtney Naughton is a Jersey Shore native who moved to Bluffton. Yes, the Courtney who went to Brick High School and graduated in 1991. If I dated you in the 90s, send me an email at courtneynaughton@hargray.com. You know I’ll reply!